Grief is a funny thing…
Sometimes, celebrating the happy, big moments in life can bring about unexpected sadness rooted deeply in grief. Take today for example, we have been busting our asses in preparation for the initial launch of the website and transitioning from Gordon Family Gallery to 2 Creative Crows. We’ve enjoyed making new things and learning a lot – from social media to website stuff. So much to be proud of, happy about, and excited for and my traitorous brain decided to take advantage of a quiet moment in the storm and remind me.
Remind me of what you may ask? That my Mom, Robin, won’t be excitedly and anxiously waiting for the official start of this new endeavor. She won’t be not-so-secretly trying to be my first sale on the website, just for me to feel her love and support. That even if I don’t sell one other thing, it’s ok, because she believed in me. You see, my Mom was my biggest fan – the true epitome of “Clap and cheer so loud, your kids won’t notice who isn’t”. She was encouraging in all things, “shaking her pom poms” as she’d say. She passed away in 2021 and I have felt her loss greatly every day since.
I know that today should be a day of celebration, and trust me, it still is. But something I like to say often is, “Two things can be true at the same time”. This is a not-so-great example of this. I AM excited and proud. This IS worth celebrating. But I am ALSO sad and miss sharing this with my Mom. So, why share this on a website that claims to sell things that bring joy? Because without sadness, we may not recognize the joy.
I chose to include a blog section on our website because art is a form of journaling for me. I create based on my moods and to express so many different emotions and events going on in the world and my life. This is no different – I want to look back on today or the things I create and REMEMBER the feelings, the good, the bad, and everything in between. I want to remember that not only was today a day of joy, but it was also one of remembrance.
In this way, I can also include my Mom in this special day. I chose to wear one of her favorite sweaters and her sunshine necklace. She always said I was her sunshine, but today, she can be mine. Thank you, Mom, for your encouragement then and even now. I know that you’d be proud and right along side us for the ride. Hell, I’d probably be sending you my posts to edit. You always were way better at spelling and grammar.
